Where to begin. The Easter USA talks did not go over very well. Questions arose which made me decide to tell them all about me and N. Suddenly, the USA thing was forgotten and hours were spent on them yelling, calling me names and just really coming down hard on me for the impending breakup. Very few things were said about moving – dad said he had zero faith in me “making it”; mom said I was stupid and that I was never ever gonna come back if I chose to leave and that I was running away. The breakup was my fault, I was stupid, inadequate and clearly did everything wrong and this was all just history repeating itself.
I don’t think anyone is capable of making me feel quite so shitty as my parents. As you can imagine, that had me spiraling for days and it caused a massive conflict between me and K. I think we’re both still reeling from it. More conflict was added from N and CH. They started talking again. Me – nope, she’s not talking to me. I’ve asked him several times why, considering his previous determination to cut her out. After a bunch of non-answers I get: “we’re talking about what it means to be single“. What?
A couple of days later, K asks her if they still talk. She says, yes he keeps saying that he misses me blah blah, we talk about us and stuff like that. He asks if she’s told me about it, she says no I don’t wanna hurt her feelings. Fucking what?!
So. I guess I know who I’m dealing with. They’re both assholes. I guess mom was sort of right, history is repeating itself.
I can’t stand CH right now. And her relationship with K is bothering me so fucking much. I worry it’s gonna be an irreparable thing. Oh did I mention that her new playpartner is KH? Fucking what?! Jesus Christ.