So, it’s past midnight and I’m sitting on the floor in the living room, “celebrating” my EAD all by myself. Not sure when my husband gave up but he did at some point without letting me know. He does that a lot. He does various things without letting me know. …
I hate my brain. I hate my insecurities. I hate that I’m bothered by the “first thing in the morning, last thing before bedtime” whatsapp conversations, the almost daily “I miss you”-s, the nicknames that I never got and how insignificant it makes me feel despite me having all I …
Or something like that. Started with going to Chase for the 3rd time to try to open a joint account but surprise surprise, that didn’t work. Apparently they dont accept governmental receipts as proof of anything. These damn banks are driving me crazy. Will try Bank of America tomorrow. Went to …
I’m bored. I spend 99% of my time in this apartment. Current mood: annoyed, irked, bored, restless. It’s Saturday. I get it; he spends most of his time not at home, around others so he’s completely cool with just being here on the weekends. As long as I get out …
I guilted my mom right back after that obnoxious email of hers and she apologized and realized she was being an ass. So there’s that. On the other hand, there is yet again conflict with K, although this time it’s all on him being an ass. He was saying yesterday …
The love of my life, my best friend, my furry baby…is gone. Worst day of my life thus far. Don’t want to talk about it, too hard. I’m a mess. Some other time perhaps. In other news, N has been shittalking me really badly apparently. So now at least I …
I’m extremely anxious. To make matters worse, my choice of examiner (Calle, who so graciously accepted in a heartbeat) might fall through because the damn examiner group feels like it should be a professor and Calle isn’t one. So now I have to wait for them. Fucking shit. I really …
I completely lost my shit today. Worst day ever. Firstly, N announces, out of the blue, as he’s making dinner: “Oh by the way, Kim is on webcam just FYI.” Talk about having a ton of bricks dropped on my head. This made me so ridiculously uncomfortable in my own skin …
My weird mood passed after spending a few hours organizing our stories. I had an idea. I’m making a book, as a gift for K. Printing our stories etc. I even wrote a new one. Doing that got me out of my mood and into a good one, at least …
The parents talk went as expected, the first couple of days were not great, a lot of drama, guilt and crap in general. Although I have to say that ever since those initial couple of days, things have been…good? Surprisingly good, actually. No drama, no guilt. Every time the topic …